Hiatus – Julia Clement

Lost Keys

A woman is a woman is a woman.

I was just late to the party, needing to find myself first.

I was on the hall table with the lost keys and the mail.

I just don’t understand the English language.

If homophobes are people who hate gays, why aren’t homophones people who chat to gays?

Or iPhones with Grindr installed?

Q: What do dead Kiwis tour Europe in?

A: VW Zombis.

If God had meant us to put ice in our whiskey they never would have given us the Sahara Desert!

Schrödinger could never tell if his Girlfriend was #satisfied or not.

Jokes: a moment on the lips and a lifetime on the quips.

In the doctors waiting room.

The magazines untouched while all the patients use our devices. I check a cover … older than the iPhone 1

(Last time I was in my Doctor’s Waiting room I noticed that the magazines were gone … obviously this joke needs retiring.)

Definition of irony: I just discovered my recycling bin has no recycling mark.

Meaning when it wears out or the council changes it I’ll have to send it to the landfill.

Did my first serious bit of coding in 18 months yesterday & this morning this.

It’s an omen I tell you. An omen!

Be careful what you wish for.

You might find a specialist who will prescribe it.