Series – Page 4 – Julia Clement

Field Marshal Britain

Name: Field Marshal Britain

Origin: Originally a super fan of Bernard Montgomery, independently wealthy Frederick Matthew Britain was injured by a runaway horse at the Trooping of the Colours and taken to hospital in a coma.

When he awoke he saw F. M. Britain on the bed’s whiteboard and decided he must be Field Marshal Britain, superb organiser.

Nothing since has managed to shake this belief.

Powers: Since the accident he really has been a superb organiser.

Somehow he has convinced the government to release radioactive material to his “Secret” nuclear research laboratory.

Aims: To end all Britain’s and the other 15 Commonwealth Realms’ woes through the application of peaceful nuclear technology.

Weaknesses: Minimal attention to safety. Half the heroes in the Realms originated in accidents at his lab.

Super Files

In 2015 I briefly did a joke about stupid superheroes, centred on Drunk Man, Woman Man + others at Field Marshal Britain‘s labs, loosely based on the style of the Marvel comics I devoured as a child in the 1960s.

Basically: Radiation + accident-> Super powers.

I revisited this joke in 2023-2024.

Now I’m doing an expanded set of Supers as memes.

Starts tomorrow.

Bonus Episode, South Pole Global Warming

Funny how flat Earthers never consider how global warming is already affecting polar ice caps.

What if it melted the ice wall and the oceans emptied into space?

Our Ancestors Episode 4, Homo Ergaster

Homo Ergaster (Workers) were a development of erectus who managed to put horniness aside long enough to do a day’s work.

After a few intermediates they became us.

Workers survived into the 21st century when neoliberal politics finally ended them.

They may survive in East Asia.

Our Ancestors 3, Homo Erectus

Homo Erectus (Randy Man) was the longest surviving human species.

Population pressures from its devotion to sex caused it to range from England to Korea but also stopped it innovating, making identical hand axes for nearly 2 million years.

Our Ancestors, Handy Man

Homo Habilis (Handy Man) was only around about 300,000 years but had time to invent scrapers, monogamy and, of necessity, the dildo.

Ancestors Introduction 2/2

Lets start with two important ancestors.

Homo Habilis & Homo Erectus: Handy man and Randy man.

Ancestors Introduction 1/2

We seem to love hearing about archaic humans but mostly only Neanderthals & recent Europeans get much press.

Let’s look at some older ones.

Conspiracy Theories Episode 6, South Pole 2/2

Me: Wouldn’t giant hologram projectors need a lot of power?

Them: Yes, powered by the giant coal fired power stations in Australia.

[end]

Conspiracy Theories Episode 5, South Pole 1/2

Them: The ice wall is at the South Pole, not the North.

The Americans have a base there that generates powerful holograms to make it look like a point.

[continues]