Joke-a-day – Page 27 – Julia Clement

Inspire

It’s better to inspire than to expire!

Do yachts have “Sail by” dates?

We have a super early bird special for people who already have worms.

I applied for a job as a comedian but the recruiter just laughed at me.

Homeopathic cure for drowning: Start with water & dilute it with water until there is no water left.

Because of the bad publicity, Covid-19 has gone into hiding & is now named Covert-19.

65.5 million years ago an asteroid crashed into Mexico and wiped out the dinosaurs.

Including those further north who hadn’t the foresight to build a wall.

Too soon?

I stopped ride sharing when my car broke down underground.

Mechanic said it was the worst case of carpool tunnel syndrome he’d ever seen.

My superpowers are intact! I hung the washing & now it’s raining.

I just found out that a Cockapoo is a type of dog.

That’s worse than taking the piss.