Joke – Page 2 – Julia Clement

Fake Winter

Winter’s not real.

It’s just a plot by Big Puffer Jacket!

I woke up today to find an email from Wikipedia.

Someone had tried to break into my account.

Luckily my password is a very strong one: VeryStrongOne123!

It’s getting dark outside.

I think I’ll go and panic buy lightbulbs

Q: Why did the chicken cross the toad?

A: Autocorrect!

Time and peristalsis wait for no-one.

A new study shows that people will believe almost anything that begins “New study shows.”

Why do I feel like I’m living in a Phillip K. Dick novel?

Probably “Now Wait For Last Year.”

I don’t believe in karma.

I’m still trying to decide how I feel about korma!

Toilet paper shortage?

I’m switching to a low fibre diet for the duration.

I don’t want to seem irrational but I can never remember if numbers are real or imaginary or both and that’s integral to a complex problem!