Food – Julia Clement

Caesar

Caesar said “Veni, vidi, feci sem” (I came, I saw, I made salad)

I’ve just realised.

Butter really doesn’t melt in vegans’ mouths.

Pizza?

Hell¹ yes!

Other brands, not so much!²

I’ve just realised. Butter really doesn’t melt in vegans’ mouths.

I’m carefully studying the margarine.

I don’t want to spread any fake butter.

I bought a large tub of margarine to share with my neighbours …

community spread.

Organic food’s another name for an old idea.

My mum used to serve up steak and kidney, liver and bacon, sweetbreads, etc.

We just called it “Offal.”

I think my Google-foo is failing.

I typed in my symptoms & it said I have cannelloni.

Not even close, my pastaia swears I had fettuccine.

I have diarrhoea & feel wobbly. I told you my cooking at home wasn’t safe.

I’m staying home and eating my own cooking.

Hmmm.

Safer to dine out.