I’m writing some new gags on centipedes.
I’m sure this idea’s got legs.
Blogs
Flat
The Earth may not be flat but my bike’s rear tyre is.
Washing Machine Redux
I once lived in an apartment with a Smeg washing machine.
It worked well but to wash my underwear I needed to carefully clean the bowl first.
Cormorants
I looked up cormorants and shags on Wikipedia.
Seems the only difference is cormorants lack crests and the crested birds just want to shag.
Transphobes
Q: How many transphobes does it take to change a tyre?
A: One, the others are scared their lacy panties will show if they bend down.
AI?
I’m convinced AI stands for “Artificial Incompetence.”
Cross The Toad Redux
Why did the chicken cross the toad?
Because it was a poor typist!
Toilet Paper
No need to bulk buy toilet paper.
Unwind it to get more than one wipe per roll.
Caesar
Caesar said “Veni, vidi, feci sem”
(I came, I saw, I made salad)
Airline Pilot
Why do pilot’s uniforms still look like military officer uniforms from the 1940s?