Comedian – Julia Clement

Open Mics

Julia: At an open mic, some comedians will kill and others will die.

DEATH: All good. Either way suits me.

Some comedians will kill. Others will die.

Either way I’m happy.

“They said that comedian died … how stupid do they think I am?

I can see they’re still walking and they don’t look like a zombie to me … I hate zombies.” [followed by 2 minute rant about zombies]

OK Julia, you’re supposed to be a comedian.

Think of something funny to say.

There’s nothing funny about being funny.

Being taken seriously as a comedian only sounds like an oxymoron.