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Julia Clement

Comedian, Playwright, Director, Producer

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Julia Clement

Tag: Comedy

Moon Landing

Moon Landing

Cinematography in 1902 was nowhere near advanced enough to fake a moon landing so we have to accept Georges Méliès’ <> as a record of the first successful French moon shot.

It’s a shame that they lost their moon base to the NAZIs in 1940 & never got it back.

Julia head and uper body with one hand covering the mic.Author A Joke A DayPosted on June 16, 2026June 15, 2026Categories Joke-a-dayTags AucklandComedy, Comedy, France, Moon Landing, NZComedyLeave a comment on Moon Landing

Winston Peters

Winston Peters

Winston’s the laxative of NZ politics.

If he’s the answer, you really can’t give a shit.

Julia head and uper body with one hand covering the mic.Author A Joke A DayPosted on June 15, 2026June 13, 2026Categories Joke-a-dayTags AucklandComedy, Comedy, NZComedy, Politics, WinstonLeave a comment on Winston Peters

Sunglasses

Sunglasses

You can always spot Aucklanders …

Windscreen wipers on our sunglasses.

Julia head and uper body with one hand covering the mic.Author A Joke A DayPosted on June 14, 2026June 13, 2026Categories Joke-a-dayTags Auckland, AucklandComedy, Comedy, NZComedy, SunglassesLeave a comment on Sunglasses

Not Mad!

Not Mad!

Political correctness has not gone mad, it’s just on antidepressants.

Julia head and uper body with one hand covering the mic.Author A Joke A DayPosted on June 13, 2026June 10, 2026Categories Joke-a-dayTags AucklandComedy, Comedy, NZComedy, PoliticalCorrectnessLeave a comment on Not Mad!

Measles

Measles

English measles: “I have measles.”

German measles: ,,Ich habe Masern.”

Julia head and uper body with one hand covering the mic.Author A Joke A DayPosted on June 12, 2026June 10, 2026Categories Joke-a-dayTags AucklandComedy, Comedy, Measles, NZComedy, SickLeave a comment on Measles

Fast Food

Fast Food

The ultimate in fast food, the Heisenburger.

You can either know where it is or how fast you’re eating it.

Julia head and uper body with one hand covering the mic.Author A Joke A DayPosted on June 11, 2026June 10, 2026Categories Joke-a-dayTags AucklandComedy, Burger, Comedy, Fast Food, Heisenberg, NZComedyLeave a comment on Fast Food

Omnivore

Omnivore

What’s the best thing about pulled pork?

You know the pig died happy.

Julia head and uper body with one hand covering the mic.Author A Joke A DayPosted on June 10, 2026Categories Joke-a-dayTags Animals, AucklandComedy, Comedy, NZComedy, Pork, Pulled PorkLeave a comment on Omnivore

Making

Making

Jokes are like babies.

Everyone loves them but nobody wants to see them get made.

Julia head and uper body with one hand covering the mic.Author A Joke A DayPosted on June 9, 2026June 7, 2026Categories Joke-a-dayTags AucklandComedy, Babies, Comedy, Jokes, NZComedyLeave a comment on Making

Ted Talks

Ted Talks

Ted talks: Mansplaining on steroids.

Julia head and uper body with one hand covering the mic.Author A Joke A DayPosted on June 8, 2026June 7, 2026Categories Joke-a-dayTags AucklandComedy, Comedy, NZComedy, Ted TalksLeave a comment on Ted Talks

Comedian?

Comedian?

Pontius Pilot was a comedian.

The Bible says he nailed it.

Julia head and uper body with one hand covering the mic.Author A Joke A DayPosted on June 7, 2026Categories Joke-a-dayTags AucklandComedy, Comedy, NZComedy, Pontius Pilot2 Comments on Comedian?

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