Joke-a-day – Page 2 – Julia Clement

Phase

Don’t worry about being alive.

I know it’s just a phase you’re going through, you’ll grow out of it.

Small text: The mythological character formerly known as DEATH

Add extra colour to your salads with these pretty red mushrooms.

Small text: The mythological creature formerly known as DEATH

Q: What do dead Kiwis tour Europe in?

A: VW Zombis.

Small text: The mythological character formerly known as DEATH

I’m over donating to cancer.

The cynical bastard takes our money and keeps killing people.

Day 12,345, still no Godot.

DEATH steps in.

I really like my new name.

I am now called “It’s just a bad cold.”

[The mythological character formerly known as DEATH.]

Chocolate is highly toxic to rabbits.

This makes me wonder if the Easter Bunny gives humans chocolate in a lagamorphic attempt to wipe out humanity?

Julia: Why is airline food so bad?

DEATH: Something has to make post funeral refreshments seem good.

Julia: At an open mic, some comedians will kill and others will die.

DEATH: All good. Either way suits me.

[Small text: The mythological creature formerly known as DEATH]

Does the bar serve diet blood or just that crappy blood zero?

Asking for a friend.

[Small text: The mythological creature formerly known as DEATH]