AucklandComedy – Page 6

Omnivore

What’s the best thing about pulled pork?

You know the pig died happy.

Jokes are like babies.

Everyone loves them but nobody wants to see them get made.

Ted talks: Mansplaining on steroids.

Pontius Pilot was a comedian.

The Bible says he nailed it.

Safety First: Always web surf between the flags.

I’m writing some new gags on centipedes.

I’m sure this idea’s got legs.

The Earth may not be flat but my bike’s rear tyre is.

I once lived in an apartment with a Smeg washing machine.

It worked well but to wash my underwear I needed to carefully clean the bowl first.

I’m convinced AI stands for “Artificial Incompetence.”

I looked up cormorants and shags on Wikipedia.

Seems the only difference is cormorants lack crests and the crested birds just want to shag.