DEATH – Page 2 – Julia Clement

Salads

Add extra colour to your salads with these pretty red mushrooms.

Stop sending me virgins …

Do I look like a chaperone?

Julia says “One day the stars will align.”

DEATH replies “Yes! On 6 May 2492. It’s the 1,000th anniversary of Columbus’ first trip.”

Julia says “I think I am dying.”

DEATH replies “I’m awfully busy, wait your turn Julia.”

Don’t worry about being alive.

I know it’s just a phase you’re going through, you’ll grow out of it.

Some comedians will kill.

Others will die.

Either way I’m happy.

David Seymour: Too many children are spreading Covid at school.

DEATH: Not wanting to endorse breathing, but can’t you limit it to their breaks?

All berries are edible.

Some only once.

They said that comedian died … how stupid do they think I am?

I can see they’re still walking and they don’t look like a zombie to me … I hate zombies.” [followed by 2 minute rant about zombies]

DEATH: Here I am, laughing in the face of life.

(The mythological character formerly known as DEATH)