Homeopathic cure for drowning: Start with water & dilute it with water until there is no water left.
Tag: AucklandComedy
Hiding
Because of the bad publicity, Covid-19 has gone into hiding & is now named Covert-19.
Dinosaurs
65.5 million years ago an asteroid crashed into Mexico and wiped out the dinosaurs.
Including those further north who hadn’t the foresight to build a wall.
Too soon?
Doggie
I just found out that a Cockapoo is a type of dog.
That’s worse than taking the piss.
Loyalty Scheme
I’ve started a loyalty scheme for my fans …
Every 10th joke is free!
Accessible Toilets
Have you ever noticed that they have Mobility Parking yet Accessible Toilets?
Is this a subtle hint to men not to move too much in the toilet?
Gum Crime
Gum crime is out of control!
Yesterday there was a large chunk stuck to my shoe.
Too Soon K-T -> Pg
They renamed the K-T boundary to the K-Pg boundary because the thought of asteroids wiping out the dinosaurs was too much for young children.
Hedgehogs
Hedgehogs may look cuddly but they are selfish pricks.
Rocket Fuel
Rocket fuel is so toxic that 51 years later nothing grows at the Apollo 11 landing site!