March 2026 – Page 2 – Julia Clement

Toilet Humour

For a person who dislikes toilet humour, it’s amazing how many of my jokes involve lavatories.

Driverless?

If there are driverless cars, why aren’t there riderless bicycles?

Breaking News

Breaking News: I dropped a tray of crockery!

Accessible

Have you ever noticed that they have Mobility Parking yet Accessible Toilets?

Is this a subtle hint to men not to move too much in the toilet?

Clowning Around?

Coulrophobia: Fear of clowns, but no word for fear of comedians?

AREN’T WE SCARY ENOUGH FOR YOU?

Crystals

A large number of experiments have shown crystals to be just as effective as homeopathy without running the risk of water borne diseases.

Cockapoo

I just found out a Cockapoo is a type of dog.

That’s worse than taking the piss.

Metric

The metric system seems natural to us as we have 5 digits on each hand, 10 in total.

A few countries like 12, for exactly the same reason.

Covert 19

Because of the bad publicity, Covid-19 has gone into hiding & is now named Covert-19.

Julia Clement’s Joke a Day

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A Joke A Day

I’m a comedian but not a one-liner one, frustratingly, from time-to-time one filters into my brain. It seems a terrible shame to never use them so I thought I’d try posting them here. The joke a day is to encourage me & not any kind of promise but so far I’ve only missed once. Julia Clement @juliaclement

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