The funniest thing about my DEATH character is that it’s doing live comedy.
Phase
Don’t worry about being alive.
I know it’s just a phase you’re going through, you’ll grow out of it.
Small text: The mythological character formerly known as DEATH
Salads
Add extra colour to your salads with these pretty red mushrooms.
Small text: The mythological creature formerly known as DEATH
European Tour
Q: What do dead Kiwis tour Europe in?
A: VW Zombis.
Small text: The mythological character formerly known as DEATH
Cancer?
I’m over donating to cancer.
The cynical bastard takes our money and keeps killing people.
Waiting For Godot
Day 12,345, still no Godot.
DEATH steps in.
New Name
I really like my new name.
I am now called “It’s just a bad cold.”
[The mythological character formerly known as DEATH.]
Easter Eggs
Chocolate is highly toxic to rabbits.
This makes me wonder if the Easter Bunny gives humans chocolate in a lagamorphic attempt to wipe out humanity?
Airline Food
Julia: Why is airline food so bad?
DEATH: Something has to make post funeral refreshments seem good.
Open Mics
Julia: At an open mic, some comedians will kill and others will die.
DEATH: All good. Either way suits me.
[Small text: The mythological creature formerly known as DEATH]