Methamphetamine, morphine, methadone, and cocaine found in Auckland sewer system.
Where’s the crocodiles?
Carrot
I ate a plant based carrot once and it was horrible.
Be careful out there gourmands.
Trees
My joke about thinking trees flopped.
It was too cerebral for most and too arboreal for others.
Open Mics
Julia: At an open mic, some comedians will kill and others will die.
DEATH: All good. Either way suits me.
Diet Blood
“Does the bar serve diet blood or just that crappy blood zero? Asking for a friend.” The mythological creature formerly known as DEATH
Et In Arcadia Ego
DEATH: Et in Arcadia Ego. (“Even in Arcadia, there am I”, Mission Bay not Arcadia, but who’s counting?)
My Stars Will Align
Julia: One day the stars will align.
DEATH: Yes! On 6 May 2492. It’s the 1,000th anniversary of Columbus’ first trip.
Salads
DEATH: Add extra colour to your salads with these pretty red mushrooms.
Virgins
Stop sending me virgins …
Do I look like a chaperone?
Conspiracy Theory
Schrödinger’s conspiracy theory: You can’t tell if it’s real or not until the FBI lets you subpoena the records.