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Julia Clement

Comedian, Playwright, Director, Producer

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Julia Clement

Unemployed

Unemployed

Nobody needs to be unemployed in this country.

You can always get a job sitting outside Burger bars asking for spare change.

Julia head and uper body with one hand covering the mic.Author A Joke A DayPosted on December 18, 2025December 13, 2025Categories Joke-a-dayTags AucklandComedy, Burger, Comedy, NZComedy, Unemployed

Typos

Typos

A typo prone friend asked if his jokes were any god so I printed them and put one on each of fourteen fresh graves.

No resurrections yet.

Julia head and uper body with one hand covering the mic.Author A Joke A DayPosted on December 17, 2025December 13, 2025Categories Joke-a-dayTags AucklandComedy, Comedy, Friends, NZComedy, Typos

SciFi

SciFi

I’m writing a book about a science fantasy author who secretly writes romances.

It’s transgendre literature.

Julia head and uper body with one hand covering the mic.Author A Joke A DayPosted on December 16, 2025December 12, 2025Categories Joke-a-dayTags AucklandComedy, Author, Comedy, NZComedy, SciFi

Air Band

Air Band

The set was ruined because the air guitar was out of tune & the air drummer’s tempo was worse.

Julia head and uper body with one hand covering the mic.Author A Joke A DayPosted on December 15, 2025December 12, 2025Categories Joke-a-dayTags Air Guitar, AucklandComedy, Comedy, NZComedy

Clearing Customs

Clearing Customs

My brother took ages to clear customs.

In retrospect it was probably a mistake to send him a txt asking if they’d found the drugs yet?

Julia head and uper body with one hand covering the mic.Author A Joke A DayPosted on December 14, 2025December 12, 2025Categories Joke-a-dayTags Airport, AucklandComedy, Comedy, Customs, Drugs, NZComedy, Text Message

Solar is the Future

Solar is the Future

It’s dawned on me that solar power is the answer, but it won’t happen overnight.

Julia head and uper body with one hand covering the mic.Author A Joke A DayPosted on December 13, 2025December 7, 2025Categories Joke-a-dayTags AucklandComedy, Comedy, Future, NZComedy, Solar

Flight Delayed

Flight Delayed

At Auckland airport waiting for my brother.

Before I left home 1/2 hour ago flight was 13 min early now 17 late.

Did it stop while I drove?

Julia head and uper body with one hand covering the mic.Author A Joke A DayPosted on December 12, 2025December 7, 2025Categories Joke-a-dayTags Airport, AucklandComedy, Comedy, Flight, NZComedy, Plane

Endoscopes

Endoscopes

With so many jokes on endoscopes relying on innuendo, I prefer to sit them out.

Julia head and uper body with one hand covering the mic.Author A Joke A DayPosted on December 11, 2025December 7, 2025Categories Joke-a-dayTags AucklandComedy, Comedy, Endoscope, Innuendo, NZComedy

Trickle Down

Trickle Down

I refuse to surrender my country to people who think climate change is fake and trickle down is real.

Julia head and uper body with one hand covering the mic.Author A Joke A DayPosted on December 10, 2025December 7, 2025Categories Joke-a-dayTags AucklandComedy, Coalition, Comedy, NZComedy, NZPol, Trickle Down

Woke or Sleeping?

Woke or Sleeping?

The opposite of “Woke” is “Sleeping”.

Julia head and uper body with one hand covering the mic.Author A Joke A DayPosted on December 9, 2025December 7, 2025Categories Joke-a-dayTags AucklandComedy, Comedy, NZComedy, Woke

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